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Monday, February 10, 2014

Be My Guest - Dr. Larry Day

This month's guest blogger is Dr. Larry Day, author of Day Dreaming Tales, conveniently available as a Kindle book.
Please join me in giving him a big welcome.

Larry claims that a horse his mother was riding on the way to the hospital to deliver him bucked her off into a patch of four leaf clovers. He says he's felt lucky ever since.

A few facts about Dr. Larry Day:
  • His real name is John Laurence Day.
  • He was born in Idaho of godly Mormon parents.
  • He's been married to the same woman nearly 50 years. They have two children and two
    grandchildren.
  • Because his parents and his wife indulged him, he earned BA, MA and Ph.D. degrees.
  • Because the United States of America indulged him, he has earned money, among other
    things, as a potato picker, newspaper carrier, stage hand, model in a student art class,
    graduate assistant, newspaper reporter, copy editor, foreign correspondent, full time
    university professor, Fulbright lecturer, trainer of journalists on three continents,
    documentary television crew member, nonfiction book author, short fiction writer and
    humor columnist.
Larry is here to entertain us with his wonderful humor. Take it away, Larry.

Hold the Phone by Larry Day

My Dad and Mom were born in the 19th century. My dad worked for the Mountain Bell Telephone Company in Idaho back in the 1920s, ‘30s ‘40s. I have a telephone from the late 1920s. It is 13-inches high and weighs about five pounds. When I was young, phones were
much more compact, and you could get any color phone you wanted as long as it was black. There was only one telephone company in the United States.


To make a call you the lifted receiver. An operator said, “Number please,” and you said, “570, please.” From a central telephone exchange, the operator would connect your phone to
that phone, and it would ring. Calling long distance was often costly and time consuming.


Nowadays a person takes out a piece of plastic and types a message and it appears instantaneously on the receiver’s screen 8,000 miles away.


Nowadays, also, there are lots of telephone companies. And they all want you to know their names, so they put a tagline at the bottom of your text messages: “Sent from my XYZ phone.”


I’ve decided to send my own text message taglines:

  • Sent from my dog’s flea collar.
  • Sent from my snow shovel.
  • Sent from a can of soup in my pantry.
  • Sent from page 137 of the paperback novel I’m reading.
  • Sent from the cuff on the right leg of my jeans.
  • Sent from a glass of buttermilk in my fridge.
Read more of Larry' quirky humor in his collection of short essays titled, Day Dreaming Tales. For quick quips, follow him on Twitter, too: https://twitter.com/daydreaming_ld 

7 comments:

Duke_L said...

I have a special kinship with Dr. Day. He was my advisor, mentor and friend at the U. of Kansas. Great, funny guy with a dry, understated wit a la Art Buchwald He has one failing: He can't play Gin Rummy to save his life! In '89 he took me overseas with him on one of his teaching assignments. Widened my horizons. I'll never forget his kindness and will always love him.

Anonymous said...

He left out good friend...

Anonymous said...

I like the ring of "Sent from dog's flea collar"--though in my case I'll substitute cat for dog!

-Elspeth

Jess said...

I love the idea of sending a text from the snow shovel. Perfectly appropriate in our recent weather! I've enjoyed Dr. Day's friendship over the past few years as he has helped me improve my writing.

Stefani said...

Funny, caring, smart AND absent-minded. Best dad a girl could have. I love reading his humor columns. Mostly I love reading his life stories.
P.s. he's been married MORE than 50 years!

William Kendall said...

Sent from my dog's flea collar is what it's coming to!

Nice to meet you, Larry!

Jo said...

Funny ideas. I too have lived through the same things, and seen the same changes. How about sent from my coffee cup?