Today is my birthday. My dear grandmother, were she alive, would advise me to take to my bed with the vapors and let my family wait on me hand-and-foot for the duration of my annual illness. A southern lady to her core, my grandmother succeeded in dying without anyone, not even my grandfather, knowing her exact age.
This morning, in response to the birthday wishes from my children and husband, I pointed out, cheerily I might add, that I am halfway to a right angle. And, since my genetic makeup has instilled in me an innate need to always be right, especially when engaging my siblings, this is a fantastic milestone. Who doesn't want to be right? Right?
"It's like I'm halfway to heaven!" I exclaimed.
"You're just as close to flat lining," remarked my beloved spouse. (He's the risk taker in the family.)
My grandmother would advise me at this juncture that I have been far more graphic than a southern lady should. So adieu. I'm off to enjoy my birthday!
This month, every person who uses the buttons below to purchase a signed copy of If Mama Don't Laugh, It Ain't Funny or Tuck Your Skirt in Your Panties and Run or The Beast of Blue Mountain will be entered in a drawing to win an If Mama Don't Laugh apron (a $23.00 value). The apron reads If Mama Don't Laugh It Ain't Funny and is Teflon coated to resist stains. Winner will be selected in a random drawing and notified on Monday, December 2.
Buy one of each book and have your name entered in the drawing three times. Buying two of the three books enters your name two times. Buying one of the three books enters your name one time.