Once upon a time, there was a pretty little girl who believed everything her mother told her, including that old line about someday her prince coming and bringing in-laws with him. Her mother read her the story about the princess who kisses the frog and turns it into a handsome man. "Love makes everything beautiful," said her mother and the child believed it.
Then one day, the little girl found a critter in the forest. She took it onto the palm of her hand and considered its features. She was not afraid, but she grew more and more skeptical as her mother urged her to kiss it. Her mother even offered to pay her a quarter if the young girl would simply place her lips upon the creature's slimy forehead.
For a moment, the sweet child considered her options:
A realist to the bone, the girl suddenly questioned everything she had ever been told about princesses and princes. After careful examination of the animal, she reasoned that she had captured a toad and not a frog. Since there are no documented cases of kissed toads turning into princes, she refused to place her lips upon it. Not knowing exactly what that toad would turn into when she pressed her mouth to its - perhaps a belly scratching, beer drinking buffoon - she deemed the endeavor too risky and set the little guy free.
Everyone assumes that it lived happily aver after, but no one really knows.